faithfullyTRUE

September 17, 2010
Poetry
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faithfullyTRUE

by Gerald T. Ching

 

In the moments of my deepest and darkest times

when life has overcome me with its worldly grief

and I am brought to my knees in desperation.

A loving Presence graces me and soothes my soul.

 

The long days that pass by these weary eyes,

flow into the dark nights that weigh upon my soul;

filled with stillborn dreams, stark

with the realities of a fallen world.

 

Enshrouded in this dimness

is a sparkling light of hope

that flickers and flares

within the deficiency of my character.

 

Thoughts and feelings get

pushed and pulled from my struggling soul.

Living in that sparkling light

an Angel of Christ lives

who battles daily to lift this heavy curtain of burden.

 

Quietly with purpose and in purity

he stands full of love, in Truth.

 

With a humble and pure heart

he stands in servitude, awaiting

the final transformation of my capricious soul

as goodness sweeps away the cluttering debris.

 

Sealing me with Your Holy Spirit,

a warm reassuring smile eases the furl of my brow;

brightening the gloom

that surrounds my existence.

 

From the darkness a little boy emerges

naked, frightened, broken, and shivering;

Your Spirit breaks through the barriers that bind.

There is sad joy in his little eyes

as a waterfall of relief rains down.

 

Pulled by an unseen magnetic field,

the darkness seeps away. A reassuring gesture

beckons him into Your heart, filling

the strange longing within his own heart

as he is drawn across to You.

 

In a deep embrace, his soul is finally united –

home at last. Giving way to a bright future

full of big dreams and surrounded by brilliance,

this all encompassing loving light

overflows with compassion.

 

In the moment of my deepest and darkest time,

when life defeated me with its worldly grief

and I stood at the doorstep of death,

I was swept away in the arms of Christ;

brought from the darkness and into the light, saved.

GRACE III: grace story

September 15, 2010
GospelGrace
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The more I meditate on the grace of God, the more I am convinced that the only reason that I am not dead is by God’s grace. And the only reason I am where I am today is by God’s grace. It is only by God’s grace that any of us are not as bad as we know in our hearts that we could be and it’s by His grace that we are also the best we could ever be. The amazingness of God’s grace is that it is free with no strings attached. If you have never spent time meditating on God’s grace, I highly urge that you do. I would even suggest that you begin to ask God to reveal to you just how His grace has impacted and shaped your life. I don’t know about you, but I’m tired of letting other things shape and form me. What is it that is shaping your life apart from God’s grace?

In my last post, I talked about the equal need of God’s diamond of grace resting in and on each of our lives and how it’s not about degrees of grace, but rather differing facets of the whole of God’s grace. And how grace flows freely out of the goodness and kindness of God’s heart towards us. I would also add to this image that God’s diamond of grace reflects the reality of the Kingdom of God because grace is also the overflow of the Kingdom of God. The more I learn to embrace the fullness of God’s grace upon my life, the more I will learn to rest and walk in Holy Spirit. And the more I rest and walk in Holy Spirit, the more I will live in the atmosphere of the Kingdom of God. I mean, Jesus says that “the Kingdom of God is within you” (Luke 17:21 NIV) because the Holy Spirit lives within every believer (1 Corinthians 6:19).

Grace is simply amazing. From my perspective, embracing God’s grace and experiencing living in the Kingdom of God go hand in hand. I know whenever I get to share my God story with people, they are impacted by the reality of the Kingdom of God because they are impacted by the love of God and the hope of the Gospel which are large components of God’s Kingdom. That’s why I truly believe that testifying about how God’s grace has impacted and shaped our lives is so critical because the words of our testimony have the power to reveal both God’s heart towards people and the reality of Kingdom of God. I mean according to Scripture, the weapons of our warfare against the Evil One are the Word of God, the blood of the Lamb and the words of our testimony. What’s your grace story?

GRACE II: grace flow

September 14, 2010
GospelGrace
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I think it is safe to say that we have all at some time received grace. Grace is unmerited favor. It means receiving something undeservedly. Simply speaking, this may mean receiving mercy in a trial or blessing in hard times. I find that generosity is a good descriptor of grace because out of the goodness and kindness of heart grace overflows. Often times one of the hardest things for a person to do is to receive grace. We would much rather work for the favor, than have to owe someone. But, this isn’t grace because grace gives freely with no strings attached. This is real grace. I mean that’s what I gather from reading the Bible, God gives generously and freely (no strings) out of the goodness and kindness of His heart. Do you believe this?

I’ve often heard grace described in terms of degrees. But, the more I experience God’s grace, the more I’m confronted with the inadequacy of this description. I believe a more robust image is needed in order to really capture the magnitude of God’s grace. We are all in need of grace, so rather than speaking in terms of degrees I’d like to propose facets, like a diamond. The amazing thing about God’s grace is it’s vastness, but also it’s particularity to each person. So rather than think in terms of more or less grace (degrees), it makes better sense to describe God’s grace in terms of differing facets. Because Sin manifests itself in differing ways in people’s lives, so differing facets of God’s grace will be needed. It’s not that a person needs more or less of God’s grace, but rather each person needs a unique combination of the many differing facets of the whole of God’s grace.

Now what has sparked this whole theological musing is the desire to level the playing field (so to speak). I mean Scripture says that “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” (Romans 3:23 NIV), but I can’t tell you how often I hear people compare themselves to others in terms of grace: “that person needs more grace than I do” or “I don’t need as much grace as they do.” But, I believe this kind of thinking often comes from a place of self-righteousness, I mean isn’t that the way the Pharisees saw it? This way of thinking can begin to both directly and indirectly form an unspoken hierarchy amongst the people of God. Again, it’s not that we need differing degrees of God’s grace, but rather that we are in need of differing facets of the whole of God’s grace. Maybe to some this may seem like semantics, but my heart behind all of this is to bring greater love and unity to the people of God where we truly begin to see that we are all in this together and that from Heaven’s perspective we are all in equal need of God’s diamond of grace resting in and on our lives.

GRACE I: grace dealer

September 13, 2010
GospelGrace
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I was called something the other day that I’ve never been called before: a grace dealer. Now if you know my story that’s more than just a little ironic. Personally, I find it miraculously hilarious! Only God could transform a person from being a drug dealer (a destroyer of lives) into a grace dealer (an encourager of lives). But, I’m getting ahead of myself. What spurred our conversation was the fact that I love to pray grace into people’s lives. From my understanding of Scripture, without God’s grace we are all lost to our own devices, dysfunctions and distortions. Hence, the reason that I love to pray that God’s grace would literally invade a person’s life. Have you ever thought about what the world would be like without grace? I shiver at the thought.

Grace is a crucial component to the healing and recovery process of addicts and alcoholics. From what I surmise from reading the Bible, grace has a way of setting people free from the bondage of sin. I mean when Jesus walked among us, He embodied in fullness both the grace and truth of God (John 1:17). And this grace and truth healed and set people free because anytime grace is mixed with truth it will always encourage and empower people. It is also through Jesus that we experience the depths of God’s amazing love. I know I say this a lot, but knowing the Father’s perfect unconditional love changes everything. His love has a way of turning our divided, shallow, hardened, wounded, scarred and deceptive hearts into whole, deep, tender, healed, renewed and genuine hearts.

I mean God’s heart towards us is to let His wonderful grace rule in our lives, over and above sin (Romans 5:21). But, giving people grace can be messy business because who knows what they may do with this grace. I believe that’s why Paul admonishes us to not abuse God’s grace by using it as a license to sin (Romans 6:1,2). But, from God’s vantage point, He’s not worried. He knows what His grace can accomplish in a person’s life and He’s patient. There’s a verse that says “God’s kindness leads to repentance” (Romans 2:4) which I couldn’t agree with more. But, if you’re like me, than it’s all too easy to slip into the mindset that through judgement people will come to repentance. And though I do believe that the fear of judgement can lead people towards repentance, it will always be God’s grace that brings a person into His presence.

SOULmate

September 10, 2010
HopejourneyPoetryRedemption
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SOULmate

by Gerald T. Ching

 

As the  days creep on in their persistence

I walk along a lonely stretch of earth, gazing.

In the distance, Your lone figure breaks the horizon,

the vaporous heat exhales itself from the ground

blurring and shimmering.

 

Heavy, persistent, burdensome thoughts

weigh upon my fevered mind. With the sun high in the sky,

I make my way towards You. Sweat flows freely

from the pores of my skin, tiny snowflakes of salt form

as I slowly dehydrate in the heat.

 

Crackling lips longing for moisture

burn with the passing of the hour, Your figure

still an oasis within my eyes. Throwing

each apathetic foot forward in a mechanical shuffle,

I am bound to this mission until my death.

 

Shriveling like a prune, I become

like sand with the passing of the hour.

My fate flashes before me

as I fall with the setting sun into deep slumber.

 

Within this peacefulness,

I find a wellspring of hope.

Tears well as the seal is broken

to this resource of unending strength.

 

Filled, refreshed, and rested

I rise with the dawn. As the day’s heat

starts its relentless onslaught, red fills my vision

as I slowly open my eyes.

 

Focusing within these fleeting first seconds

Your Holy Spirit encompasses all – reassuringly steadfast.

With the last bit of my own strength seeping away, I fall

into Your arms. Within Your arms I curl

like a newborn longing for security.

 

Questions rise to my lips

but go unspoken – Your Voice

resounds in my mind, answering all.

For in my weakness

Your strength carried me to You.

 

This long journey back home ends

with a blinding lightning show

as tiny rain droplets fall from a clouding sky,

refreshingly washing away

the memories of a painful life apart.

 

Together at last, the mission complete,

You envelop me completely,

giving me sweet refuge.

availABLE

September 8, 2010
callingGospel
1 Comment

Over the past few weeks, the question that the Lord has been asking me is, “Are you available?” You see, God has been crossing my path with quite a few people who keep telling me stories of how God has been using people who have simply made themselves available to Him. It’s really easy to think that God only uses people who are gifted and talented or mature in the faith. But, that couldn’t be further from the truth. I believe God uses people who simply make themselves available to Him. Let me explain. When God calls us to something we can trust that He will enable us to do the work He’s called us do. But, we need to let go of our own agendas and expectations and just come with a willing spirit and expectant heart. God is near to us and I believe is continually talking to us, but most of us fail to recognize His voice when He speaks because we are so consumed with our own agendas and in achieving our own expectations.

I am and have been a spiritual director to a growing number of people which I disciple in hearing the voice of God for themselves. I believe that God’s heart is to position all of His children for Kingdom work, but because we have made ourselves unavailable to Him; we get passed over and God raises up someone else. Recently, I’ve been hearing story after story of God positioning the most unlikely of people to do great and amazing things for His Kingdom simply because they made themselves available to Him. People who trusted in their ability to hear God and who also believed that God could empower and equip them for whatever work He was calling them to do. How well do you recognize our Shepherd’s voice? I am constantly having to remind myself that I do hear God and that He does speak to me through Scripture (of course), but also through my thoughts, imagination and the feelings and convictions within my heart. The Holy Spirit dwells within us (1 Corinthians 6:19) and speaks directly to us (Romans 8:16). God also speaks to me through other people, music, animals and creation at large. Viewing creation often makes me marvel all the more at the amazingness of God our Creator. If we seek to hear God’s voice, He will reveal Himself to us (Matthew 7:7,8; James 4:8).

But, at the end of the day, step one for us is to simply say, “Here am I. Send me” (Isaiah 6:8 NIV) and not worry about what step two is. Instead, we need to trust that God will empower and equip us in preparation for whatever is step two, three, four, five, etc. But, if you’re like me, it’s really easy to spend too much time waiting on God, when often times He’s already spoken to me and I am just being hesitant, fearful, even lazy at times. God has been steadily weening me off of needing to know too many steps because He wants to cultivate more faith in me. I mean, it really doesn’t take much faith if we already know what lies ahead. But, the more we make ourselves available to God, the more He will stretch and build faith in us by positioning us in situations that will proclaim that the Kingdom of God is near. I’ve heard this preached and I believe it to be true: doing great things for the Kingdom of God demands great faith. What I’m starting to believe is that God is waiting for more people to simply say to Him, “Lord, whatever You would have me do, I am willing.”

Just last week I was in Toronto, Ontario with some friends both old and new and we ended up walking around a public park, listening to Holy Spirit’s voice and leading in whom He desired that we talk to, pray with and prophesize for. In some Christian circles this is called “treasure hunting.” It was an amazing time. God lead us to very specific people, who needed to know that God sees them, loves them and wants to heal and save them and redeem the pain in their lives. He did this by giving us descriptive clues like green shirt, big sunglasses, straw hat with ribbon, park benches and brown sandals. Afterwards, I was spending time with God processing all that happened, when I asked Him if there were more people that we could talk to, pray with and prophesize for. What I heard next, I will never forget. God said to me that “there will always be more work, there will always be someone who needs to be loved and cared for.” In that moment, I felt the immensity of the work that lay ahead. I mean aren’t those Jesus’ words in Luke 10:2 which says, “The harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field.”

So this is my prayer: “Father, soften our hearts towards You. Set us free from whatever hinders us from making ourselves available to You. Forgive us for when we get too busy with our own lives and in building our own kingdoms. Change our hearts Lord, transform us into people who simply believe that You can raise anyone up to do great things for Your Kingdom. Cultivate the faith needed within us to do the greater works that You said we would do. We believe You when You say that “the harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few.” We want to be those workers whom You call to labor in Your harvest fields. We trust You Father with our very lives and the lives of our families. In Jesus Name, Amen.

FREEdom II: living free

September 6, 2010
FreedomGospelGrace
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Walking out the freedom that Jesus extends to His followers is easier said than done. The sad reality of our fallen condition is that we would rather live the way we are familiar and comfortable with, even if it means living in bondage, rather than embrace the new and unfamiliar way that Jesus has for us. I mean, the scary part of being a new creation in Christ (2 Corinthians 5:17) is the deep longing to be transformed, but not knowing what that looks like and the difficulty in being able to recognize the new way when God brings it into our lives. But, I do believe that the more we learn to embrace this new way, the more our hearts will trust in God’s ways where the rocky road of sanctification will become more comfortable to us than the smooth road of convenience. At the heart of this is trust: learning to trust in the goodness and grace of God.

Rather than rattle off verse after Scripture verse that talks about the goodness and grace of God (I do recommend doing a word search of both words) I think a better question to ask is, “What kind of thorns and scars do you have in and on your heart?” You see, it is these thorns and scars (our woundedness) that keeps us from living free because our woundedness keeps both God and people at arm’s length. It’s our woundedness that distorts the way we see the world, people, ourselves and God. But, the Good News is that God is lovingly faithful and patient and His perfect love has a way of healing our hearts. The more we soak in His love the more our hearts are tenderized both towards Him and people. What I love about God’s unconditional love is that His love is active, meaning, His love moves Him to pursue us. Isn’t that the words of John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”

When I came to faith roughly 10 years ago, I remember feeling so inadequate in my ability to both give and receive love. I also remember being moved by Holy Spirit to begin asking Jesus to show me what it means to love and be loved. I literally prayed this prayer for at least three years, if not longer. Today, I’m feeling the same tugging at my heart to begin again praying this prayer. It’s humbling, the deeper I delve into the Father’s heart, the more aware I become of the shallowness of my own love, both for God and others. From my perspective, living free means the ability to love free. But, our woundedness is stingy with love and likes to horde love which hinders us from loving freely. Now a verse that has been a great comfort to me is “We love because he first loved us” (1 John 4:19 NIV). What this says to me is that I don’t have to generate love on my own, rather all I need to do is lean into the Father’s perfect unconditional love and His love will begin to fuel and fire my own love which will also set me free to love.

When I look at Jesus’ life while He walked the earth, I see a man who loved passionately, faithfully, authentically, virtuously and completely free. Jesus knew what it meant to love and live in freedom. Nothing held Jesus back from living and loving free because He fully understood our Father’s love for Him. He knew without a shadow of a doubt that He was God’s beloved Son. It is the same for us, knowing that we are God’s beloved sons and daughters changes everything because the more fully we embrace this reality, the more readily we will “approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need” (Hebrews 4:16 NIV). I know personally, the more I am around the throne of grace, the more I understand who God is to me and who I am to God. He is my beloved Father and I am His beloved child in whom He adores and delights. When we experience the depths of the Father’s love, His love heals, saves, redeems, restores and sustains us. Remember nothing can separate us from the love God has for us in Jesus (Romans 8:31-39).

Living free means loving free. Being a new creation in Christ means becoming more and more like Him each and everyday which means learning to love more passionately, faithfully, authentically, virtuously and completely free. Jesus promises us that if If we seek the freedom to live and love free, we will find it (Matthew 7:7,8). I don’t know about you, but that sounds like Good News to me. This is my prayer: “Jesus, show us what it means to love and be loved. Show us how to live and love freely. Teach us to love like You. Heal the wounds of our hearts that hinders us from living and loving free. Whatever it takes Jesus because You are worth it. We love You our Savior King! Amen.”

LOVE of my LIFE

September 3, 2010
Poetry
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LOVE of my LIFE

by Gerald T. Ching

 

Coming in from the cold, I feel

the rush of heat that blasts from the furnace. I curl

and crunch my toes, wiggling them

in my heavily worn boots

while rubbing my hands together

to help work the circulation back.

 

Flush with the relief of warmth, I make way

to the kitchen table where you wait.

Shadows light your face grotesquely in the dimness

that illuminates the room. Hesitantly,

but with a confident air

I stride across the creaking wooden floor.

 

The air smells of memories, old and musky

their ghosts lingering. Smoke wafts

through the stagnant air from a forgotten cigarette,

the staleness giving way to the hazy deadness of yesteryear.

 

At the table you sit

surrounded by long defeated ghosts.

Your eyes shining in the dimness

strong and true, steadfast.

His strength holding you within yourself.

Unmoving and unwavering,

your calm demeanor eases

my own anxiousness.

 

With you by my side

and me by yours, our worries

float to the fire. Shrills and shrieks

light the furnace as the hazy mist

incinerates to ash, brightening

the small room with a new light of hope,

filling our souls with a fresh love,

and our minds with big dreams.

 

Together we hold all at bay;

together we are home.

 

Sadness welled in the pit of my heart

with the news of your departure. In that split

second, my heart fell from my chest

as grief overcame me.

Within the many tattered letters

that are now my keepsakes, your spirit lives on

as they are read in the privacy of loneliness.

 

A new season promises of joy

with the coming of Spring, a rebirth into a new life

with the melting of the snow. The first blossoms

yearning for nourishment are breaking

the hard packed ground, well rested

in the past long winter months;

their roots still having strength.

Their determination brings tears to these jaded eyes.

 

Collecting the first rays of sunshine, the seedlings

cry to the heavens, boldly announcing

their arrival to an indifferent world

as all newborns do when they are birthed.

 

Peering from the window of a fast moving car,

the blurred landscape of a passing world

covers the miles that these eyes see in all directions;

the misinterpreted vision lays heavy my eyelids. Sinking

into the plush leather upholstery

my thoughts drift into a gentler state of existence,

easing the creases in my brow; softening my face.

 

On the whispering winds my spirit catches a breeze, up

to the dizzying heights of pillow soft clouds – I fly

dreamily banking at impossible speeds, careening through

this ethereal dreamscape – I soar, drunkenly.

Through large patches of space my mind takes me.

Breaking through the cobwebs of old

that clutter my aging mind,

as my spirit soars through grace.

FREEdom I: are you free?

August 31, 2010
FreedomGospelJesus
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Have you ever really thought about what it means to truly live free? At first impulse, most of us would probably define this as: the freedom to do whatever we please, whenever we please. But, I believe that living like this will actually put us into more bondage, rather than freedom. I mean if we really sat down and took an honest look at our lives, we would see that we are all in bondage to a variety of things, both tangible and intangible, that keep us from living a truly abundantly full life. Now without going into detail about what an abundantly full life looks like. Simply put, from my perspective an abundantly full life is a life free from sin where we can actually choose not to do things. For me, that’s the core characteristic of freedom. When we are in bondage to something we lose the ability to choose. The world teaches that freedom is the ability to do anything, anytime regardless of the consequences. But, I believe that true freedom is the ability to choose to not do something. What is it in your life that has stolen your ability to choose?

Addiction is the epitome of the loss of freedom and there are so many addicted people in the world. Now, this may or may not surprise you, but, I believe, if we are all really honest with ourselves we will see, even admit, that we are all prone towards addiction. Take the the 420 Prayer Movement, we exists because of the harsh reality of the prevalence of drug and alcohol addiction. But, there are lots of people who are addicted to other tangible things like: smoking, gambling, food, video games, the Internet, sex, shopping, work, gossiping etc. But, there are also lots of people who are addicted to intangible things (which often times underlie the tangible addictions: anger (rageaholism), lust (fantasizing), stress & anxiety (always being in crisis), greed (accumulation of stuff), comfort (adverse to any change), laziness (lack of motivation), pain (self-punishment/mutilation), etc. But, the story doesn’t stop with our addictions. At the heart of the 420 Prayer Movement is the greater reality that true freedom can happen through Jesus. Do you believe this?

I mean, we all may say we believe this, but do your prayers reflect the truth that God is still supernaturally transforming lives? More specificallly, that He not only is able to set people free from addictions, but that He actually wants to do this because I believe He does. If you have never heard my story, please check it out because my own life is testimony to this truth. Too often I hear people say, “Well, that’s just the way I am” or even “What’s the use, I can’t change.” What this says to me is that they’ve lost any hope to change and are living purely coping lives without much hope, let alone joy. Addiction has a nasty way of sapping any and all hope, life and joy from people’s lives. But, that’s not what the Gospel says, at the heart of Jesus’ ministry was to preach good news to the poor, to proclaim freedom for the prisoners, recovery of sight for the blind and to release the oppressed because the year of the Lord’s favor has arrived (Luke 4:18, 19). What all of this tells me is that Jesus came to set people free! He even says, “So if the Son sets you free, you are truly free” (John 8:36 NLT). Are you free?

to tHE last

August 27, 2010
Poetry
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TO THE LAST

by Gerald T. Ching

 

In dark slumbering dreams

when the commotions of life,

simmer down

and the pounding in my chest

helps to remind me that I am alive,

Your Spirit engulfs me

in the sweetness of Your essence.

 

In smoky mirrored lens

the dense fog of broken memory

lifts the swirling and fleeting images of remembrance

that flash like fire flies, grounding me

from floating away to be lost into the unknown.

 

My mind toils in jealous rage,

threatening to harden this gentle heart.

Blinding images that lie to my mind’s eye

causes a roaring uprising,

sending me weeping in anger

to sulk in a lightless corner.

In isolation, in the desperate depths of worry

I am forced to battle these rising tides.

 

Clothed in the many blankets of my defenses,

behind the tall towers of these strongholds

I weep in long, loud, hard sobs

wishing for an end to the menacing

green-eyed monstrosity of suspicion

running in hateful rampage and with blind abandon.

 

I am helpless.

 

Stark, vengeful thoughts

bubble and boil in my sinful mind.

Racing at light speeds, the flickering images penetrating

the fog of war that has blinded

the eyes of my heart, which is spiked in fear.

The anxious pounding in my chest

reminding me of this weakness,

breaks me to my knees in submission;

raging and reeling in guilt.

 

Exhaustion over comes me

with the passing of this first wave.

The rushing of adrenaline

seeps away unforgivably in this jealous rage,

taking a little piece of my gentle spirit

without a second glance of regret;

thoughtlessly discarding it,

haphazardly tossing it among all the other debris.

 

With the trumpeting of the buglers sounding the cease fire,

all commotion slows as judgment finally falls across the land.

Laying in heaps on the battlefield, scattered and strewn about

amongst the loneliness of senseless violence

lay the bits and pieces of shattered souls.

In pathetic piles, in stillness, breathing in labored exhales,

their light slowly dims.

 

In the distance with the setting sun

pestilence, fire, decay and death menace the horizon.

The four horsemen of the apocalypse ride,

sweeping up the scattered debris.

Bearing down on the fields of war

they trample the remaining fading stars.

 

Gathering up the extinguishing bits

of darkness and light into themselves,

in supreme justice they clear and cleanse,

leaving in their wake a barren wasteland

with the sun sizzling finitely into the sea,

while the moon rises for its final dance in the cosmos.